My Music Community
Learning new things has been a mixture of exciting and stressful , terrifying and stressful or frustrating and stressful when it comes to creating or performing music. When I wrote my first song – I had no real structure that I followed, there was no conscious effort to rhyme in a pattern, I just wanted to get the feeling conveyed. And when I performed it, I wanted it to take on its original feeling that I had while writing it. That’s where the terrifying came in --- It was nearly impossible to be in my heart when I was so nervous about how my voice sounded or afraid of making a mistake or getting lost in the middle of the song since I don’t read music – I only have the lyrics in front of me… the list went on and on. I joined a songwriting group which was such a powerful step for me. Me claiming myself as a singer/songwriter brought me to a new level of owning who I am and forever changed me. I watched myself rise to occasion, fumbling and awkward like a little bird just learning to fly. Only thing was ~ I felt like I was meant for this! Just needed to get some confidence and practice! I have learned so much and continue to learn about everything.
This group consists of all level of musicians who meet once a month at a little theater and we support each other in our journey. There are presentations about 20 minutes or so on any topic of the music world and then it becomes an open mic. But without the mic! We all sign up if we want to perform and they have any of the new members play first. I think that was by design so we wouldn’t chicken out! They had a piano but it faced the wall and when I played and sang you could barley hear my lyrics. I was so nervous that first time. Then I decided to bring my keyboard - I had to lug around my heavy keyboard, get it all set up blah blah blah – I would often talk myself out of it feeling like it was too much work even though there were often folks that would offer to help me get the keyboard, stand and bench from my car to the stage or I would injure myself and be in pain for days. I had to work through all of that.
I stuck with it and continued attending – feeling motivated to have a new song for the next meeting. AND it helped me to keep practicing being on stage in front of an audience. Granted being in a Showcase Concert is more terrifying than just a handful of folks! (the theater seats 80) Facing the resistance and having a group of folks that will listen intently was so important for me as a new artist. Having someone cheering me on or in my corner was very motivating for me. Being part of the Songwriters annual showcase was HUGE!! Having a place to go where I belong. We have been meeting via zoom during the pandemic and it’s been such a blessing.
This group is so important to me – I learn so much, they are amazing people and we all so enjoy playing music!